Tag: remembering

by jad

Spooky Season and My Father’s Dying Days

I guess I wasn’t really actively thinking about it much last year, but the reality is, spooky season will always coincide with my father’s dying days and final demise from now on. That puts a different spin on every memento mori of this time. It was actually my dad’s birthday on Sunday, but I didn’t know what to think of that. All I can think about is that we never really made much of thing of it while he was alive. So, now what? x Soon, it will be 1 year since, in just less than 1 month. And soon … Continue reading “Spooky Season and My Father’s Dying Days” →

by jad

Camera Lacrimosa

Roland Barthes wrote a book about photography called Camera Lucida, a play on “camera obscura,” that ancient primogenitor to Polaroids and Instagrams. In it, he introduces useful terms for reading photographs, like “studium” (the presence of elements that lend themselves to sociocultural or historical analysis) and “punctum” (the features that convey a meaning in an individual without invoking any recognizable symbolic system), anchoring his reflections in (his) subjectivity and emotion. Halfway through the book, however, Barthes seemingly abandons his whole project (or takes it to its logical extreme) and begins to meditate on a single photograph of his own recently-deceased … Continue reading “Camera Lacrimosa” →

by jad

So That Nothing May Be Lost

There’s something that happens whenever I read scripture; I find myself looking for God in the gaps—not “the God of the Gaps,” that theological sleight of hand that calls “God” any explanatory rabbit pulled out of every mysterious hat, but rather, the spirit of God’s lessons for us, today, at the margins, in the silences, on the thresholds—in any place we overlook. That these gaps exist is undeniable; so what, if anything, is the Spirit saying to God’s people there? We can ask this question in different ways when reading this Sunday’s gospel text. This event—often called the Feeding of … Continue reading “So That Nothing May Be Lost” →

by jad

Radio Dis/loc/ution

x “Zayin is masculine—ZACHAR. And there belongs to this man a beard—ZAKAN. And this man is old—ZAKAYN. And this man can look back through time—Z’MAN, and he remembers—ZACHAER, everything.” MMXX is a Spotify playlist I made in/for #TwentyTwenty and @rbinbetween. x “Only he who is beaten—KATEET, like oil which has been beaten from olives, until he is—KASHER, pure and fit, shall drink. Then Kaf turns itself into a crown.” AMALGAMA is a Spotify playlist I made during eclipse season. x “There is another kind of Resh. This is the end of pretending. ROSH HASHANA, the day of admitting. Master of the universe! RIBONO … Continue reading “Radio Dis/loc/ution” →

by jad

Memorial Day Weekend

I found this pin two days ago; it’s see-through. Maybe it was yellow once but it’s not yellow now. I found that interesting: a memorial without a memory.  Yesterday, I went to church without realizing that I was in fatigues until I saw someone walk in wearing full officer’s regalia. So I put the pin on.  Memories of unknown soldiers in invisible wars. Bonus points for its refusal to stay in focus every time I tried to take a photo.

by jad

It’s More Than True, It Actually Happened

“it’s a couple of years I suspect you don’t have a physical existence anymore like us other humansfor what I know you might not existyou might be a projectionyou might have become an immaterial entityre-assessed only through narrationlike syria, or santa claus” Annalena to my “face” on September 25, 2012 September 25, 2012 was the 269th day of the year 2012 in the Gregorian calendar. There were 97 days remaining until the end of the year. The day of the week was Tuesday. Libra is the zodiac sign of a person born on this day. It has been 3162 days, today included. Or 8 years, 7 … Continue reading “It’s More Than True, It Actually Happened” →

by jad

‘the piecing together of dissociated knowledge’

Two young men with a tripod and a luminous rod taking photographs in a dark, residential courtyard; a lone smoker sitting on the stone street furniture circumscribing the parking lot on The Mound; a plastic bag blowing uphill, along the designated pedestrian walkway beside the torn up sidewalk; a bathroom light left on. Facebook status, March 6, 2012

by jad

Marking Time: 20 Weeks of Gratitude, Week 16

Part 1: Non-Standard Calendar Time has been an interesting medium and muse for this weekly ritual. When I started this, I knew that I’d be making a partner of the unfolding days; I did not have a script nor plan for the whole arc of my gratitude in the first twenty weeks of #TwentyTwenty. I had general bearings, but no clear map—anything more definite would have been a contradiction in terms. So as we begin to crest the horizon and near the last leg of this journey, I’ve become increasingly aware of the regions of time that I’ve lingered in … Continue reading “Marking Time: 20 Weeks of Gratitude, Week 16” →

by jad

Pantograph

“Third proposal.” By number two, I suppress a groan, my muscles aching from the unforgiving pew and long hours.  “Third proposal: Welcome our gifts and our limitations too.” There’d been a death in our building. Across the hall, a neglected toothache took a troubled life away. No judgement. “God welcomes everything in us; in our turn, we can accept ourselves just as we are. That is the beginning of a healing that is so necessary for us all.” That morning, the bus was crawling up Pill Hill, like it did every morning. There was a stop for the Good Vibes hat, … Continue reading “Pantograph” →

by jad

Memory and Place and Monument

I was moved by Trinh Mai’s tender and careful artworks; in her statement, she writes: “Art is the channel through which I connect my spiritual to my earthly existence…For me, it has made the intangible tangible and the unseen visible, and at times, offers comfort in the seemingly unbearable. It is my form of study and prayer…” Mai’s is one third of a ‘triptych’ of exhibits organized by @uwgradschool called ‘Memory and Place,’ showing until May 3 at Gould Gallery. ‘Memory and Place’ also featured the work of Studio Zewde. The exhibit explores the idea of the memorial as more … Continue reading “Memory and Place and Monument” →